Fear
You cannot be brave without being afraid. Read that sentence again. What would actually be brave to take on if you didn't feel fear about it? Brave people are scared people.
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Fear, cowardice and courage
Fear is one feeling which most people feel uncomfortable with. Being afraid is also associated by many with being a coward. But cowardice and fear are two completely different things. Fear is a basic emotion, it has nothing to do with how you act. Being a coward is not a basic feeling but depends on how you act on your fear. Courage and cowardice can be said to be opposites, both require fear to exist.
Getting through life as a scared person
Are you pissed off that you are always afraid? Do you have the tactic to ignore the fear and instead "close your eyes and jump"? That tactic will certainly get you ahead, no doubt. The question is whether little you keep up. Maybe it creates in the long run anxiety, an anxiety based on different parts of you not trusting each other. That is, a lack of self-confidence. The fearful you do not trust the bold. But both are needed and both need to be satisfied.
You can go to meet both. By admitting that you are afraid and taking control of yourself, you create security. From there, you can challenge yourself and do what you fear in a way that is deliberate and careful.
Take yourself in hand
Can you see yourself in front of you as a 5-year-old? How do you look like? Are you smiling or are you sad? Maybe you are shy? If you now see how small you are very afraid of something that she or he really wants to do, or has to do. How would you best help her or him implement it?
In fact, you still have that little kid inside of you. Your fears are still there and the little innocent you are in there. You need to secure yourself. One way to do that is to take yourself in hand and show respect for all your feelings. They are there for a reason. When you accept and embrace your fear, just as you should embrace and accept all your different emotional states, it becomes easier to be brave.
Basic safety
An inner security is something we build up during our childhood. Depending on factors such as how secure your upbringing was, how your attachment to your parents looked and whether you were allowed to feel loved and understood for who you were, you got more or less inner security with you from the start.
Exploring the world from a place of safety is far less scary than doing it from a place of insecurity. Because from an insecure place it's hard to trust that you always have something to fall back on. If you are confident in yourself, you know that everything will work out. You know you can take care of yourself and handle any situation you find yourself in. The lack of inner security makes the world and its challenges scary.
If you have a lot of fear in you, it may be that you lack a basic inner security. You can build it even in adulthood. By raising awareness of how you function, what you need to become safe and practice in small steps, you can build self-confidence and security. You build the feeling that you can cope and that you can handle any situation you find yourself in from experience.
Vulnerability and strength
Fear is beautiful. It shows vulnerability. Do you judge a person who shows their fear or does it make you like them even more? Probably the latter. Love yourself as much as you love other people. Love your fear. It is there to protect you and it will teach you a great deal along the way, as you challenge it in safe conditions and turn it into courage and strength. You are strong.
On Vitaliseras courses in depth self-awareness and self-development you get to face your innermost fears and find your courage.
