Do you own your own feelings?
To be able to lead and respond to other people in a mature way, you need both to be able to stand in your own feelings and own them.
The opposite of owning your feelings is blaming what you feel on others. "He made me angry". "She made me feel worthless".
It is, of course, natural for emotions to emerge in interaction with others. But what are the feelings really about? When you are triggered by someone else, it is often old wounds or fears within you that have been brought to life. Wounds and fears that you carry with you from early in your life, and which kick off old behavior patterns in you that can be negative both towards yourself and others.
If you have not become aware of your own emotional and behavioral patterns, it can be difficult to own your own feelings. This can usually lead to an experience of powerlessness, that you take on a victim role or that you get easily angry and blame everything on someone else.
When you have made an inner journey and worked with yourself in depth, it becomes easier to see your own reactions and understand where they come from in the moment. It also becomes easier to meet others where they are in an open and accepting way, and then and there to be able to distinguish what is actually yours and what is theirs.
Mature internal leaders also become mature external leaders.
